OPINION: WHAT DO WOMEN WANT IN MEN?

From the top of my head I could rattle of cliché answers like love, money, looks, intelligence, and care. But, it is much dicier. Every woman is unique in her own way. A combination of a few might work for some. Others can make do with one quality though qualities as such are rarely exclusive of all others. For a few women however, it has to be everything. Such women are more likely going to spend the rest of their lives not being content with their man and always looking above their shoulders to see if they can better deal.

So, what do women want?

Love: Every woman wants love. We all seem to agree. But, what is love? Does every woman want a man who loves them, or a man they love? Both? Wouldn’t that be ideal? As much as we want people to believe, love is not really this deep unconditional emotional feeling. Love is very often based on a factor or combination of factors. Maybe the way a guy smiles, maybe the way he takes control, could be the way he keels to your whims. So, the next time you’re inclined to declare, “She doesn’t want love”, know this. She does! She loves Musah. Is it because he has money? Maybe! Does he love her back? Irrelevant, but at least, we’ve established that, she’s after love, as vague and relative to situations as it is.

Money: Most guys I know have their money on this (pun intended). I agree. Money makes everything easier. Women love money because they know this. Women who make their own money will feel better knowing their man makes enough not to feast off their own. Now, here is the reason I think this is becoming an overshadowing factor. Because men think women want money, they are more likely to pursue it to the detriment of all other attributes that should make them better people, or make a relationship work. Now, women realize the only thing they’re probably going to get in most guys is money. So, they look for guys with more money to compensate for the fact that they could potentially be lacking in other character traits. This is not being shallow, it’s being rational. So guys, hold on to this belief. Let it be reason to fuel your ambition, that’s if making the world a better place, giving back to your parents and community, and being more secure financially are not already good enough reasons.

Matched Intelligence: Every woman looks for intelligence in a man. The level of intelligence sought varies from woman to woman though. The higher the level of the considered intelligence of a woman, the more intelligent she’ll want her man to be. There are exceptions to the rule though. Not going into that today.

Looks: Every woman has what she considers acceptable as looks in a man. Obia ne ni taste. Some pursue guys considered handsome. The higher a girls sense of security and self worth, the more handsome she thinks her man has to be. Unless you’re that girl who’ll prefer the ugly ass dude because you think no one else will want him. Newsflash Girlfriend, you dating him will increase his likability by several factors, and many other girls will want him. Now, a guy being handsome is not necessarily the features you were born with. It’s how u dress, the confidence you ooze, your smell and that sly smile that says I can get the most beautiful girl in this room.

 

Credit: Saajida Shiraz
M.Phil Student
Political Science,
University of Ghana.
twitter: @saajiraz

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A SPECIAL GIFT TO YOUR SPECIAL WOMAN: BE A PART OF TIMI DAKOLO'S 'IYAWO MI' MONTAGE VIDEO

Nigeria’s King of Soul; Timi Dakolo has announced his decision to present other men with a chance to give a gift to their special women using the Iyawo Mi video.

Fans of the artiste can now be a part of the love letter by sharing photos of their wives or fiancées in the montage video which will be premiered at the end of March 2014.

“I want to give my guys a chance to give something special that they can enjoy to their women. I want to personalize the song for every lover, I want this to be part of every love story, someway,somehow!” said Timi Dakolo

Want to be a part of it? Just follow these easy steps.

1. Send a photo of your woman, yourself and both of you together to
Iyawomi@timidakolo.ng

2. Include your names and status of relationship – married, engaged or
dating and for how long.

Entries close, March 20, 2014. For more information, visit
www.timidakolo.ng


About Timi Dakolo

Timi Dakolo is an award winning R&B/Soul music artist born on January 20, 1981. He hails from Bayelsa State, Nigeria and grew up in the city of Port-Harcourt, where he started his singing career at age of 12, singing in his church choir. Following his win as West African Idol first and only winner; he released his debut album titled “Beautiful Noise” in 2012, receiving great reviews for the work as well as chart successes. Timi Dakolo released another single after his debut album titled “Great Nation” which many have described as the new National Anthem of Nigeria.
Stream and download 'Iyawo Mi' (here)

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WHAT IS LOVE? – WATCH YOUR FAVOURITE CELEBS TALK ABOUT LOVE!

The question we ask ourselves once in a while…

We all have our different definitions of love. Some people define love as kind, patient, forgiving and tolerant. Others just think that it is a means of physical and emotional expressions to that one special person.

Different issues can also be raised as regards to love. We’ve got celebrities like Banky W, M.I, Waje, Tiwa Savage, Timi Dakolo and a host of others talking about “Love” and their definition of it and some of their comments will definitely get you laughing but thinking.

But when Africa’s king of R&B, Darey Art Alade talks about love…

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Breast sucking prevents breast cancer?

"Doctors recommend that women reduce the risk of getting breast cancer by having their breasts sucked. It is said that regular sucking of the breast lowers the risk level that tends to build up breast cancer. The breast must be sucked as often as possible, help women fight breast cancer today. Men, please do your part, and suck a breast now and women please let your body free!

This message is from the Ministry of Health in the Fight Against Breast Cancer."

"A BBC report suggesting that breast sucking by men and women can reduce the risk of developing breast cancer for both sexes is generating mixed reactions from the public. The report published by the BBC indicates that breast sucking has the tendency of reducing the incidence of breast cancer in men and women who engage in the practice. Most men find pleasure in sucking women's nipples and in some cases; women also suck men's nipples during love making."

Have you received a copy of this message(s) in your inbox? Is it just a rave or is it real? You might find this broadcast amusing, but it is not to be taken lightly

Breast cancer is the most common cancer diagnosis among black women, and among women nationwide. Studies have shown that when black women follow the same preventive measures as white women, their death rates from breast cancer are very similar. Although black women are less likely than whites to develop breast cancer, they are more likely to die from it, doctors have long known. Black women also are diagnosed at younger ages and at later stages of disease.

It is said that thousands of women might be spared the agony of breast cancer if they extended the period for which they suckle their babies. A study was carried out by a group of researchers in the UK. Although it indicated a relationship between breastfeeding and a lower risk of cancer, more research is necessary to clearly establish a causal link.

Breastfeeding (baby) and Breastsucking (men) are two different things.

According to James Klosky (UK researcher): Breastfeeding, in addition to diet and exercise, avoiding tobacco use, and engaging in safe sexual behaviour, is one more behaviour that can potentially ameliorate adverse late effects of cancer treatment”

Breastfeeding has been found to provide a measure of protection against uterine, cervical and ovarian cancers as well as breast cancer. A study by Yale University researchers showed that women who breastfed for two years or longer reduced their risk of breast cancer by 50 percent.

Should I suck her breast to help her reduce the risk?

Breastfeeding is what's been shown to reduce the risk of breast cancer. The researchers compared the rate at which women breastfeed babies back in the days to present days; the rate has reduced over the years. Women are encouraged to breastfeed their babies longer now because it's good for the baby's health and good for them (woman). We have not seen any report that shows that you will help your wife/girl reduce the risk by sucking her breast.

If studies show that breast sucking (by men or babies) would reduce the risk, the man who is doing the sucking will not be at any risk. His chances of getting cancer will not increase just because he is sucking the woman's breast.

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4 tips to cure bad breath.

Man, have you ever been around someone who’s breath is intolerable? Or maybe you are the one with the bad breath. It makes conversation really painful. You can practically taste those noxious fumes coming out of their mouth. And forget about kissing someone with bad breath.

Do not simply live with bad breath. For the most part, it can be cured or significantly altered. Remember, bad breath is not just socially unpleasant; it may be warning sign of undetected systemic disease.

Halitosis (bad breath) - an oral health condition characterized by consistently odorous breath. Here are four (4) steps that could help you improve the smell of your breath.

1: Keep Your Mouth Clean
Keep your mouth clean. That means a thorough brushing twice a day and flossing regularly. Food and bacteria trapped between teeth and at the gum line can only be removed with floss. If they're left to linger, bad breath is imminent.

2: Clean Your Tongue

Clean your tongue, too. Bacteria left on your tongue can contribute to less-than-fresh breath. Be sure to brush your tongue after you brush your teeth.

3: Wet Your Whistle

A dry mouth can quickly cause bad breath. Sali­va helps clean your mouth; it has a natural antibacterial action, and it washes away food particles. That awful morning breath is the result of reduced saliva flow at night.

4: Rinse

If nothing else, at least rinse your mouth with plain water after eating. Swishing the water around may help to remove some of the food particles left in the mouth after a meal and prevent bad breath from setting in.

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The Big 4 | Flirting Tips for the Ladies

Many people think a girl has to be drop-dead gorgeous like Cindy Sanyu, Genevieve Nnaji or Jackie Appiah to be really successful at flirting with a guy. The truth is this--anybody can do it. You just need to learn the basics in order to flirt correctly, impress the guy, and show him that you like him. Who knows? You might be surprised to find out that he likes you too.

Our African parents taught us to never chase a guy. He is to do all the work from point A to the very end. The typical setting is to see the dude lurking around the corner; if he is unlucky, he'll get caught in the rain without an umbrella while waiting for you to stroll by. We all know that times have changed; we (females) have to catch up with the changing times and meet the guy half way at least. Perhaps, there's one fine gentleman that is doing you strong ting like Banky W's song; here are some flirting tips to get the ball rolling.

1. Be conscious of your appearance

If you want to flirt with guys, the first thing that you need to pay attention is your physical appearance. It is not always necessary to dress provocatively, but you should wear something that looks elegant, clean, comfortable, and at the same time makes you feel confident. Remember, you don't need to have millions of expensive clothes to look beautiful because some simple fashions never go out of style. Try sporting dark, slimming jeans, a simple solid colored tank or cami, some chunky bead necklaces, or a cute sun dress.

Clean up, wear deodorant, shave frequently, clean your ears, and you could try to paint your nails. Also, try to wear your hair in a style that makes you feel pretty and use a perfume that smells sweet, but is not too overpowering. Don't mix perfumes--we don't want to have your neck smelling like cherry while your dress is smelling like agbalumo!

2. Act Right

There are multiple ways to act flirty, here are some of the best suggestions:

• Compliments

Be sure to compliment them on things that are true. Sometimes people will make up compliments just to talk to someone, but that is the total wrong thing to do. You really should compliment on things you really like, so you sound more sincere naturally.

• Eye contact

The eyes can be your most effective tool for flirting. It's possible to make a guy's heart skip a beat by giving him a playful, lusty, or lingering stare. Here is how to do it:

If you're walking by someone you've got the hots for, give him a 2-3 second stare and then slowly glance away (slow is important). Smile just as you start to look away. He'll get the message.

Additionally, when you're talking to a guy you like, take a second to momentarily break away from his eyes and pause on his upper body or chest. Let 2 seconds pass. Then slowly move your eyes back up and make eye contact again. This will give him chills of excitement. He'll realize that you were checking him out...and he'll love it.

• Hair Flip and Twirl

If you want to catch a guys attention, flip your hair casually over your shoulder (if you have hair). Twist it and then untwist it, tuck it behind your ears, or run your hands through it. If you're wearing a weave that's been styled to perfection, you might just want to leave it as is to avoid showing tracks while flipping and twirling.

• Soft Giggle and Smile

According to polls, a laugh and a smile are the sexiest things a female can wear. If you perfect your smile and laugh to be seductive and sweet, you will find some great results. Practice forcing a natural smile (at home first) and laugh, it can help through awkward situations.

• Magic Touch

You can learn to brush a guy in such a way that you send tingles up and down his spine. Casually tap him while laughing, rest your head on his shoulder if you're tired and hold his hand when you're nervous; it will give him a sense of manliness and you a touch sweetie-pie, no pun intended.

3. Move Closer to Him and Start The Conversation

Approach him and start a light conversation to get things going, but don't make it too obvious that you like him. If he approaches you, look him in the eyes as a sign of affection and confidence. The best opening line is saying hello. Talk about what you have in common, talk about your surroundings, ask a question, ask for help, state an opinion.

4. Get To Know Him

After he has come up to you and both of you have started talking, just try to find out whether he is your type or not. If you feel comfortable with him, carry on with the evening. In case he is not your type, just excuse yourself politely from his company. However, remember that you are the one who led him on. Now if you don't feel up to it, don't get unnecessarily rude.

Lastly, if he's interested in you, don't just go immediately to be "best friends" or"boyfriend." Just start hanging out with him, and become friends, slowly become best friends, until it becomes even more! You want to make sure he is the right guy for you!

Good Luck, Ladies!

NOTE: Sarah Nichols is the author of the tips--we just added a little spice to appeal to our African readers. Hope you liked this, share it with someone!

Photo Credit: Shebasgraphics

RELATED POST: HOW TO FRENCH KISS

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10 Steps to the Perfect Kiss

"My boyfriend is African; he doesn't know how to kiss!" Get that sentence out of your mouth this Valentine; it takes two to tango. If the other person is slacking, you should be in charge.
Since Valentine is around the corner, we thought it would be nice to share some tips with you. Read, practice & be perfect!

Step 1. Look into your partner's eyes.
In anticipation of a kiss or to initiate a kiss, start by gazing into your partner's eyes. Have you heard the phrase that the eyes are the windows to a person's soul? It's true. When you gaze into your partner's eyes, you'll learn their true feelings, emotions, and intentions. In an intimate situation, gazing into your partner's eyes sends an intimate message, letting them know that you want to get closer.

Step 2. Smile.
A small, suggestive smile does wonders. If you want to find out if your partner is interested, sending a suggestive smile will do the trick. If you get a smile back, you're good to go. If not, or if your partner looks down or away, you probably want to back off.

Step 3. Lean in closer.
Now that you know you're about to kiss, it's time to move in. To avoid awkwardness, move slowly. Moving in too fast can make your partner uncomfortable. As you move in, make sure that you're in a comfortable position.

Step 4. Engage in light touching.
Men: A nice touch (literally!) to the perfect kiss is to lightly touch her face as you move in. A light touch such as this promotes the feeling of intimacy between the two of you.

Step 5. Tilt your head.
Now that you're moving in, it's time to make sure that you're aligned with your partner. You want to tilt your head slightly so that your lips are lined up and there's no chance of a missed kiss. Watch as you tilt to make sure that your partner has already tilted.

Step 6. Relax your lips.
Make sure that your lips are relaxed and not tightly pressed together. The perfect kiss is pleasant, with your lips softly pressed together.

Step 7. Moisten your lips.
Lightly moistened lips make for a better kiss, so keep lip balm close. You obviously won't be able to whip out the lip balm when you're "in the moment", so prepare ahead of time. This is true for both men and women. If you're caught off guard, a quick lick of the lips will work for women. Men, you want to keep your lips a bit drier, so don't lick. Both men and women need to tread carefully here. Lips that are moistened too much can make for sloppy, slobbery kisses, while lips that are too dry make for unpleasant, rough kisses. Women, you may also want to wear a brighter red lipstick. Experts agree that the red lipstick sends sexual messages to men and is a perfect addition to the perfect kiss.

Step 8. Close your eyes.
Close your eyes as you're about to make contact. Some people feel awkward if their partner's eyes are open. Besides, you'll end up with a much more passionate kissing experience if you close your eyes and let the sensations drive you.

Step 9. Part your lips.
Now that your lips are relaxed, part them slightly as you begin contact. Don't open them too much or your partner may feel that you're 'swallowing' them. Don't keep them too closed either though because your partner may get the impression that you're not as 'in' to this kiss as they are.

Step 10. The kiss.
It's finally time for impact! Gently touch your lips to theirs and you have the perfect kiss. Be sure not to pull away too quickly. You want to take your time and enjoy it! When you do finally pull away, look your partner in the eyes again. A smile, an embrace, or a whisper letting them know that you enjoyed it are a nice way to end a kiss.

Source: RomanceStuck
Image: PlayPink

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